Monthly Archives: October 2014

People

ELECTIONS – What’s That?

Mid  Term — Congress!    Mid  Term — Senate!

America, since when is your position  “Politics is not our policy”???  Everyday you live with your problems,  you complain all year long and yet the private sector takes the stand:  politics is not our policy. America, I think it long overdue that you’re put on the front lines and questioned.

IF  politics  is such a  dirty word to you,  why do you keep voting in politicians?  Did you ever stop your dizzy spin long enough to think that there could be another alternative?  Why haven’t you thought about some men and women in the private sector are perfectly capable of serving their country on political hill.  Aren’t qualified people for political office good enough for you or is it that you do not have the intelligence to know the difference.

Those few outsiders who have thrown their hats in the political ring  (the very ones who could help you) are destroyed by your position: “Politics is not our policy.”  Didn’t you know that your ignorant views treat that legitimate candidate as a criminal?  Don’t you realize that closing your doors to outsiders means they have nothing left but the media to turn to and this medium makes your choices for you?

Can you understand the insult to a legitimate candidate’s integrity who has to crawl around behind the scenes, pleading to be heard, while being blocked by our so called  FREEDOM  OF  THE  PRESS?

Have you ever taken the RISK to RUN for office in the United States of America  as you profess it to be a FREE COUNTRY?

Can you imagine what it is to personally put your savings on the line,  stop income for 18 mo’s,  work under pressure with no pay thru 16 hr days,  have doors slammed in your face,  be buried in lip service,  be harassed by the majority that rivals assault and battery,  undergo life threatening events?

Wake up America  and take a closer look because you’ve been shooting yourself in the foot for decades.  In this MID TERM ELECTION – 2014, are you repeating the same thing all over again?  Are the statistical results of American voting going to demonstrate the probability that you’re unqualified to vote?  Is your decision based on running with the packs rather than reason?

How much longer ‘as a people’ are you going to allow  GRAFT,  FRAUD,  CORRUPTION,  instead of finding ways to take your country back.

In this writer’s family we have long served our country both in the government and private sector. And don’t think for one moment that running for political office shouldn’t be added to the tally.  Those of you who were and are Veterans have fought for this country.  Now don’t you think that it’s time for the rest of you to fight your fair share?   

Do your homework,  read congressional reports,   NOT  ‘MEDIA’ !!!

                                     *VOTE AN INTELLIGENT VOTE*

Author: A candidate’s wife,   Elaine Neihardt Smith      www.motionOsis.com

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

People

JOURNALISM ? AIN’T !

Journalism  ISN’T  JOURNALISM  anymore  today.  It’s  a  bunch  of  VIPERS  foaming  at  the  mouth  squabbling  over  what  gets  them  the  best  television  ratings.

The  news  carries  ANCHORS  who  don’t  report  the  news,  they  make  the  news.  Their  INFERENCES  are  sly  and  cleverly  slipped  into  dialog.

Get  a  load  of  those  POLITICAL  ANALYSTS  who  are  having  a  field  day  by  DIGGING  up  the  DEAD  and  bringing  them  back  to  life,  again  competing  for  television  ratings.

NEWS  TODAY  is  no  different  than  back  in  the  ROMAN  DAYS   when  the  King  would  ENTERTAIN    his  party  at  the  coliseum  by  throwing  citizens  into  the  ring  and  releasing  lions  to  MASSACRE    them.  Doesn’t  this  sound  a  bit  familiar  with  today’s  SPORTS !

OH  but  that’s  OK,  there’s  the  SOFT  TOUCH  at  the  end  of  the  news  program  called  “Making  A  Difference.’

COMON  NOW,  don’t  you  feel  as  if  your  getting  GOOSED  with  a  SUPER  FINGER?  The  21st Century  massage  job?  How  many  of  you  would  really  like  to  say:  “I’M  DAMNED  MAD  &  I’M  NOT  GONNA   TAKE  IT  ANYMORE !!!

BUT  GUESS  WHAT !  You’re  gonna  go  right  on  watching  while  cleverly  they  keep  jabbing  that  brainwashing  down  your  throat.  MIND  GAMES?  You’re  under  the  biggest  SNOW  JOB  that  has ever  hit  this  country.

Hey,  do  me  a  favor,  throw  some  raw  bait  into  the  ocean  where  there’s shark  nearby  and  get  your  KICKS  from  a  SHARK  FRENZY  instead  of  padding  those  MOTOR  MOUTH  pockets !!!

OR  if  you  enjoy  human  misery,  try  going  slumming  through  poverty  stricken  neighborhoods.  WHY  NOT  WAKE  UP  AMERICA,  get  off  your  couches  and  TURN  OFF  YOUR  TELEVISION  SETS !!!    What  have  you  got  to  lose,  INSANITY ???

AMERICA  comon  back  to  America  and  don’t  stand  for  anything  less.  Speak  OUT,  Throw  OUT,  Wipe  OUT  that  SICKNESS  coming  across cable  or  satellite  that’s  spreading  a  more  DEADLY  DISEASE  than  EBOLA !

People

LAUGH LAB – Politicians To MARS !!!

NASA  now  ANNOUNCES  the  NEW  GROUP  to  train  for  MARS  immediately!

These  candidates  will  no  longer  need  pompous  hairdos,   parties,  $5000.  suits  and  will  save  the taxpayers  from  being ripped  off  from  their   perks.

Training  will  begin  ASAP  and  last  7 yrs  which  will  give  every  unwilling  participant  plenty  of  time  to  adjust  because  their  participation  is  mandatory.

Balance  is  no  problem  as  they  are  ideal  for  the  task  at  hand  already  being  mentally  imbalanced.

Since  there  will  be  no  showers  for  months  they  can  seize  the  opportunity  of  smelling  their  own  stench  of  which  the  American  People  no  longer  will  have  to  endure.

Food  is  served  in  varieties  of  tasty  mush  but  that’s  no  problem  because  they’re  masters  at  hallucinating  their  self  serving  agendas  which  is  a  never  ending  plate  full.

Once  they  launch  on  this  long  trip  to  Mars,  they  will  have  plenty  of  time  to  bicker,  out  manipulate  one  another,   fight  for  their  selfish  rights  and  tolerate  the  hot  air  they  will  be  blowing  off.

Recreation  will  be  easy  for  them  as  a  good  time  would  be  keeping  an  eye  on  that  oxygen  mask,  even  that  body  suit,  just  in  case  any  opposing  party  decided  to  disagree  and  it’s  SPACE  WALK  TIME !!!

Arrival  and  landing  has  got  to  be  the  mostest  to  be  looking  forward  to.  Once  outside  not  a  peep  out  of  anyone,  for  just  one  outspoken  breath  of  political  jargon  without  a  spacesuit  and  that  politician  is  BYE  BYE !!!

Survival  will  be  the  most  fun  as  both  parties  will  have  to  scratch  and  dig  to  find  a  way  to  live  together.  When  they  build  their  huts,  just  think  how  their  different  territories  will  look  hanging  on  shingles:  Republican……Democrat……Independents…etc!

WHOOPS!  Guess  folks  back  on  EARTH  know  the  rest  of  the  story,  “They’re  gonna  start  that  same  scenario  all  over  again.  BUT  the  best  part  is  they  are  up  there  and  we  are  down  here!!!

 

 

 

People

LAUGH LAB – The ‘FREAKED OUT’ American!

AMERICANS   overdose  on  I WANT!   The  population  breeds  illness  care,  mental  poverty,  criminal  minds.

HEALTH  CARE  SOLUTIONS:  Export  the  overweight  kids  to  China.  Eat  rice,  ride  bicycles  and  plant  in  the  fields.  NO  KIDDING,   these  Chinese  kids  in  elementary  school  learn  several  languages  and  excel  in  science  and  math!!!

EDUCATION  SOLUTIONS:  Learn  Latin & Greek  because  your  GIBBERISH  is  reducing  English  to  GRUNTING  anyway.  Arm  teachers  with   SPRAY  GUNS   filled  with  HAPPY  GAS!

CRIME  SOLUTIONS:  Bring  back  the  chain  gang  and  rebuild  our  infrastructure.  Send  criminals  to  ‘Commander ‘ET’  in  Roswell  New  Mexico!

NOW  LET’S  BE  SERIOUS:  Education  has  a  direct  relationship  to  crime,  health  and  the  economy.  Be  part  of  the  solution  “SASA  KIDS  8  To  108”  &   get  your  ‘Instant  Fix’  with:

“GOTCHA: The Whole World Is Angry & Depressed, But Here’s What You Can Do About It.” 

Authors:  Neihardt & Smith  ASK  you  to  light  up  your  life  with  FUN  cartoons  and  CATCHY  stories,  learning  and  laughing  your  way  through  today’s  troubled  world!

 

People

LAUGH LAB – TV TRICK! Or TV TREAT!

IF  you  really  have  a  DOWN  DAY  and feel unmotivated……just  turn  on  the  TV  and  watch  some  commercials.

Out  of  shape  people  appear……JUST  TAKE  SOME  TESTOSTERONE……blares  across  the  screen  and  like  them  you’re  JUMPING  out  of  windows  because  now  you’re  UP  longer  than  down.

You  took  the  WRONG  PILL……(Cialis  or  Viagra)  and  how  did  you  end  up  in  that  strange  bedroom?  Suddenly  you  can  RUN  a  nonstop  WORLD  RECORD  just  to  find  your  way  back  home.  Bet  you  forgot  to  take  your  (tranquilizer)   or   (sleeping  pill)  instead.

WHAT  TO  DO……well  just  CHANGE  the  channel  and  hey  there’s  a couple  in  their  70’s  covered  with  grease  paint  to  look  like  their  in  their  30’s……but  who  cares  that’s  nothing!  Your  only  thought  is  DIVE  OUT  that  window  BUT  pointing  right  at  you  is  a  GUN  with  a  TERRORIST  on  the  other  end  of  it!

WHAT  TO  DO……GRAB  your  (heart medicine)  and offer  him  some.  QUICK……light  up  a  (marijuana  cigarette)  and  blow  a  SMOKE  SCREEN  so  you  can  crawl  over  your  (back  brace)  and  change  the  channel  to  football!

DON’T  WORRY……the  idiot  on  TV  can’t  see  you  as  you  wake  up  from  any  NIGHTMARES  and  find  yourself  on  the  MOON  instead  cause  you  fell short  trying  to  escape  to  MARS.

Ohhh……one  thing  I  forgot  to  tell you……that  knocking  on  your  door  right  now  is  the  FBI  who  monitored  your  phone  calls  and  emails.  BIG  BROTHER  also  confiscated  all your  confessions  on  social  networks……meaning  all of  this  constitutes  YOU’RE  UNDER  ARREST……and……you  never  left  the  HOUSE!!!

People

LAUGH LAB – FOREST FIRES? You Ain’t Seen Nothin Yet !!!

UPPERS  n  DOWNERS !!!

Gads,  these  ads  got  me  all  confused.  First  I’m  given ‘ NIAGRA’  and  feel  like  I  can  swim  up  stream.  Then  I  tried  ‘SEE ALICE’  and  suddenly  playing  golf  w/o  clubs  looked  awfully  good  to  me.

Oh  but  you  haven’t  seen  anything  yet.  I  take  this  ‘STICK’  and  rub  it  under  my  arm  pits  and  low  and  behold  I’m  AIR  BORNE!  I  guess  they  call  it  ‘TESTOSTERMOST’  but  wait  I  get  this  shot  in  the  arm  and  ‘Mars’  doesn’t  seem  that  far  away  because  I’ve  been  STEROIDIZED!

But  that’s  nothing  because  after  all that,  I  get  EGM,  ‘ELEPHANT  GROWTH  MORONS’   or  maybe  it’s  HGH,  ‘HUMAN  GROWTH  HORRORMONES.’

Well  now  I’m  embarrassed  because  everything  on  me  seems  bigger,  stronger,  and  women  love  me  because  I  can  fly  like  ‘Superman’  and  climb  like  ‘Spiderman.’  

I  said  ‘Uppers  n  Downers’  right,  where’s  the  Downers?  No  problem,  I  swim  the  ‘English Channel,’    run  up  ‘Mt. Everest,  fly  to  the  ‘Moon’  and  the  women  all know  I’m  gonna  come  back  for  more.  These  ‘Elephant  Growth  Morons’  or  ‘Human  Growth  Horrormones’  always  put  me  up  today  and  down  tomorrow.

But  I’m  happy  cause  I  tripped  out  on  ‘EGOTIZERS’  and  now  it’s  down  town  cause  I’m  ‘flaked  out,  left  out,   put  out’  and   LIGHTS  OUT !!!

Ha  Ha  Ha,   there  ain’t  NO  fire  left  to  put  OUT !

People

LAUGH LAB – Calling All GUN SLINGERS !!!

“THE  OLD  WEST”

Mount  your  horse  and  tighten  that  holster,  it’s  back  to  the  ‘good guys’  all of them armed including  ‘pistol  packin  Mommas’   with  the  instructions  of  whenever  the  ‘bad  guys’  are tryin  to  take  you  out,  you  just  take  10  steps  forward  or  backward,  (depending on how good you are)  pull  out  your  pistol  and  then  FIRE  AWAY!!!

All’s  fair  in  love  and  war.  No  more  machine  guns,  automatic  rifles  or  tomahawks  allowed.  No  more  criminals,  crazies,  nut cakes,  basking  for  life  in  our  comfy  prisons,  soaking  up  the  good life  of  TV,  4 squares  and  writing  for  profit  ‘get  rich  quick’  books.

Saddle  up  as  ‘HORSES’  on  the  ‘White  House’   lawn  instead  of  ‘Marches’   in  the  street  gets  the  attention  of  the  lobbyists,  special  interest  groups  and  breaks  up  the  parties  battling  under  Republican  or  Democrat.  

Now’s  the  time  to  DRAW  those  WATER  PISTOLS  and  blast  into  law,  quote:  “Any  moronic  Washington  Senator  or  Congressman  who  won’t  shut  up  nor  take  this  seriously,  has  to  prove  he  can  walk  on  water.”

The  ‘Wild West’  of  yesteryear  comes  back  to  life  today  in  this  21st  century.  No  more  free  speech,  courts,  jury  duty  or  debate  on  ‘gray areas.’   It’s  strictly  ‘black n white’  now  cause  we  might  have  a  police  state  if  we  DARE  to  ENFORCE  LAW.

You’re  right,  the  good  ole  USA  is  NUMBER  ONE !!!

Be  proud  that  in  the  world  we’re  #1  in  violence,  crime,  gun  ownership  with  glaring  yearly  statistics  in  the  U.S.  that  8,000  of  over  12,000  ‘murders’  are  by  ‘guns.’

WHOSE  NEXT?   On  your  way  to  school,  the  grocery  store,  shopping,  to  a friend’s  house???

WANNA  SOLUTION?   ‘PREVENTION’!    Because  it’s  not  ‘Who or Why’   but  ‘WHAT  n  HOW.’

People

LAUGH LAB – ‘KID PROOF’ ??

Did  you  ever  stop  to  think  about  internet  words?

Who  would  have  thought  Google,  Twitter,  Flicker,  Yelp,  Kobo,  Skype  or  selfies  could  get  past  your  English  teacher.

10  yr  olds  have  turned  gibberish  into  language  while  6  yr  olds  make  adults  look  stupid.  Take  texting  the  modern  day  short  hand,  now  looks  like  bloops  and  blurps  on  your  screen  where  you  must  have  spilled  something  and  forgot  to  wipe  it  off.

Get  stuck?   Try  looking  it  up  in  the  dictionary.  WHAT  DICTIONARY?

Internet  technology  advances  at  the  speed  of  light.   WHAT,   you  blinked  your  eye!  TOUGH,  you  just  lost  it  and  now  your  grand kid’s  gotta  rescue  you.

Ever  try  to  talk  or  carry  on  a  conversation  with  one  of  these  species?  If  face  to  face;  after  removal  of  ear  wires,  goggles  and  headgear;  just  have  them  outstretch  their  hands  with  fingers   moving  like  typing  AND  you  actually  can  communicate.

Don’t  feel  bad  if  you’re  a  thing  of  the  past  like  an  M.D.,  Ph.D,  CEO  or  GOD  himself.  The  vast  world  of  the  internet  has  transformed  your  10  yr  old  into  the  WIZARD  OF  OZ.

NO  WORRY,  just  pat  him  or her on  the  back  and  CELEBRATE!   He/She’s  in  the  IN  ZONE  and  you’re  on  your  way  OUT!